August 17th, 2006 / by Kevin

Jarritos Fruit Punch
Rating: 3.5

JarritosHecho en Mexico. What other three word phrase is capable of conjuring images of such magic and wonder? None! And Jarritos Fruit Punch (a.k.a “Tutti Fruiti”) delivers on that promise. This is a beverage that literally sent me on a journey, even before I’d taken my first sip. It seems the cap is not a twist-off, so I was all over creation looking for an opener. To the far corners of every single one of our kitchen drawers, honestly. I can’t remember the last time I needed one of those. But I found one eventually and the cap came away from the bottle no problem. I sipped, intrigued and emboldened by the promise of riches from a far-off land, delivered.

Fruit punch? More like fruit ambrosia. A rapturous melange of orange, cherry and lemon juices, cascading against fragrant notes of mango and passionfruit, with only the most delicate hint of goji–like a coy lover, peeking out from beneath the sheets.

J/K. Fruit punch is just code for “red sweet flavor,” right? I mean does anyone think any actual fruit was ever harmed in the making of fruit punch? No, but so what? Who cares. Not me. Mexico: you keep tossing it over that wall, I’ll keep catching it.

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