I like things that emit the scent of grapefruit. It’s a very clean aroma. You know I have that thing about washing my hands. Too bad there isn’t a soda made from eucalyptus, which actually has very cleansing properties. Oh man, can you imagine if my two obsessions, soda and cleanliness, were somehow combined. [...]

I think it was you who clued me into the vibrant Surge community? Right? I think? And how they were sad that Surge is gone from all our lives? How their day-to-day just wasn’t quite as xtreme as it used to be? And that now they’re looking to Vault, the new greenish Coke product, as [...]

Josh, have I told you what my new favorite soda is? Oh man. It’s totally Smirnoff Triple Black Ice. Shit is for real.
It’s starring in a movie called What If Sprite Wasn’t So Boring That You Wanted To Die. All the kids are going to be drinking this stuff, is my prediction. So sweet. So [...]

Man, I am on the fence about this whole Sprite Remix thing, and I need you to pull me one way or t’other. Because my short attention span is like whoa, so on the one hand, if Sprite wants to come out with a new “FLAVOR REMIX” [emphasis added] every summer, then like, I will [...]

A few weeks ago I’m in a co-worker’s office and see this sexy-looking bottle on her desk and I’m totally eyeballing it lewdly and she says, “Oh yeah, Lorina Sparkling Lemonade! This is my favorite drink!” And I admired the tasteful label design and mentioned, you know, off the cuff, that I happened to “work” [...]

You probably won’t believe this, but back in high school I was a seltzer sort of guy. I know, I know, it’s hard to imagine me — me! of all people! — being one of those walking stereotypes, swilling seltzer, wearing a mink stole, sporting a Prince Albert, growing out my pinkie nail, listening to [...]

Subjected myself to a grueling energy-drink marathon last week and am still only at 60% of my usual typing accuracy thanks to my shaking hands and this evidently-not-going-away-anytime-soon throb within the vitreous of my eyes — I mean just look at an excerpt of an entry I wrote while in the midst of the taste-tests: [...]

I am right now drinking a Pibb Xtra. I am doing this 100% for YOU, because I already had that Ovaltine this morning, and frankly I’ve been overdoing it on sugar lately and a soda is probably the last thing on Earth I need right now. But in group we’ve been talking about how sometimes [...]

I’m at the pet store this weekend picking up as many cans of cat food as I can carry, which you know is a lot, so I’ve got two teetering towers in each hand — wait, let me put it in Lord of the Rings terminology since that’s all you seem to understand these days: [...]

Man alive. People have been all at me to drink some Aranciata. The kids seem to love it. I was wary, because I’ve been burned by the good folks at San Pellegrino before. I don’t drink coffee or coffee-flavored beverages, but I like to hang out at a coffee shop as much as the next [...]